It’s time for some reflection! In this post, I’m going to be talking about lessons that I’ve learned about friendship, business, and love. I know that we’re getting into the new year and I thought it’d be the perfect time to share these things.
I’ve grown and evolved as a person, and it’s my hope that sharing these lessons can prompt some growth, evolution, and change in your own life.
So without further ado, let’s get into the lessons!
I want to start off with two lessons I’ve learned in friendship. The first one is that I’ve learned how important it is to review what’s important to you in friendships as you grow up and get older. These priorities change!
I recently revisited this and learned a lot. Sometimes, we can play a really passive role in our friendships. Maybe you’ve known someone for a long time or you formed your friendship on a view you shared. And now, your view has changed and you’re not quite aligned with that person, but you’re being passive in the relationship.
There could also be differences in where you are in your relationship due to communication differences or value differences. That doesn’t mean it’s a negative thing that means anything about either of you, but it’s definitely something to think about.
The truth is that when things like this occur in friendships, you can either work through them or face the hard realization that the particular friendship has met its expiration date. When this happens, play an active role in examining the friendships you have with people and understand what’s important to you in these relationships.
In my friendships, communication is very important to me. When I was younger, I had a lot of tolerance and space for poor communication. But I’m different now, my values have changed. I’m glad I’ve realized this because it’s important to me.
My second lesson with friendship is that how you interact with your friends over time will change, and that’s okay. It’s a huge misconception that if you don’t make friends when you’re younger or in college you can’t make friends. This is totally not true. Where there’s a will, there’s a way! There are groups to join, apps that help with making friends, and so on.
But as I said, the way you interact with your friends will change. After all, as you get older, your life changes quite a bit! Where you likely used to have a lot more time for social activities, your life and priorities will shift as you get older.
That means that as you have less time for socializing, it’s more important to spend that quality time with friends when it comes around and really make the most out of it.
Remember that many times, when people have free time, they likely will want a moment to themselves. And that’s okay! You don’t need to push yourself to operate as you did when you were younger socially. Pushing yourself to do that can be draining. You need to adjust your schedule accordingly for your own well-being and so do others.
My first lesson in business is that you will disappoint people. It’s inevitable. And to take it a step further, your business or service is not going to be for everyone. Not everyone will feel seen or heard by your mission. I’ve experienced that myself.
If you try to serve everyone, you’ll run into a lot of trouble. Each person is given a certain purpose. That’s my belief. And to make that mission and your resources most potent, you need to really zero in with your audience that is looking to hear you and interact with you.
Tapping into that audience who loves what you have to offer instead of focusing on those that you disappoint or that your message is not for is going to give you so much more motivation, energy, and clarity. You simply can’t please everyone, and that’s okay! If you were serving everyone, it would mean that you’re not standing up for anything, which is not what you want. Be clear and specific on your audience to maximize your effectiveness.
If you’re a business owner sticking to your specific way that you know how to help people, you’re doing your audience a major service. You’re giving them the premium experience they’re looking for by doing that.
The second business lesson I’ve learned is that your business will expose your commitment issues. I know, that’s triggering. But really, it will put your commitment to the test. If you want to know about your commitment habits, take a look at your business.
If you’re in the early stages of business, you’re really put to the test. At that point, it becomes clear if you’re there for just a paycheck or if you’re committed to your vision.
It always comes back to whether you believe in yourself and your vision. That has to be bigger than the need to stroke your own business. You have to have a vision that’s bigger than you, and that will get you through the growing pains that are inevitable as you build your business.
Even if you’re a more seasoned business owner, there will be moments that put you to the test. You have to go back to what you know to be true and look at what you’re there to create and to have. It all comes down to what’s important to you.
The first thing I’ve learned about money is that it’s just a resource. We put so much weight on it and it feels very personal. We see people on social media that have an abundance of money and we make it mean something about us, but we shouldn’t.
We have to think about, what do we desire this resource for? That’s what the question becomes. When you see your peers buying things or doing things in their lives that require money, you may start comparing yourself with those people. But if you really think about it, do you want to have the same lifestyle as those people? Do you want the same things that they have?
Many times, the answer will be no. You just have to put your ego to the side and understand what you truly desire this resource for. Everyone has different desires when it comes to money, and there’s nothing wrong with those differences. The important thing is that the wants you have around it are clear.
The second lesson I have learned about money is that money is not a limited resource. It’s safe to spend your money, invest it, or use it as you please. This may feel triggering if you grew up in a household where money was a constant worry or if you struggle to set money aside.
You may think I’m simplifying this topic, but I promise I’m not. Really think about it – is there any shortage of money around you? There is money in every cash register in stores around us, money circulates the stock market, and so on.
But we get an idea in our mind that money is scarce and limited. But there’s money circulating everywhere! It’s here on this planet. Your job is to take a look at the fact that money is not limited and understand your limiting beliefs around it. From there, get aligned with how you want money to play a role in your life and claim it.
You get to decide in life if you will be a victim and feel powerless or if you want to step into your agency and do something to create the life that you wish to live.
My first lesson on love is that relationships are powerful, but wanting one does not make you codependent. I used to be so paranoid about being codependent that I became hyper-independent. But I’ve come to learn that as people, we’re wired to be in relationships and have intimacy with people.
There’s nothing wrong with wanting to be in a relationship and for that to be a priority for you. It’s okay to want a partner! Society sometimes makes us think it’s wrong to want to be in a relationship and that we have to put that energy towards things like our careers.
However, you need to examine the reasons why you want to be in a relationship and ensure they’re from the right place. You should want to be in a relationship for a genuine connection to someone, not just to fill a void.
My final lesson and second lesson on love that I want to talk about is to share how you feel with your partner or with whoever you’re dating. Don’t overthink sharing things, but really be vulnerable with them and let them into your thoughts and your heart.
This will go a long way to advancing your relationship, getting to know someone, and understanding if they’re really someone you click with. Let your partner know how you’re feeling without making it mean something about them.
For instance, if you want to spend more time with your partner, share that with them. Do it in a way that tells them clearly how you feel and ask them how they feel about that or what they think. This creates a great opening for a conversation.
It was so fun to share these lessons! Evolving as a person over time is something to be proud of, and I hope these lessons have helped you to examine what you’ve learned over the past year or so on these topics, too.
Thank you sooo much for reading!
Be sure to connect with me more over on Instagram @theselflovefix, I’d love to hear what you thought of this post and what your major takeaways were.
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